Opening-Nor’Easter-April Fools' Day Musings

It had to happen, 24 Rants columns later—the woman who has an opinion about everything cannot get her thoughts together. There is no theme this week. No big idea. Nada. Zero. Zilch.

I don’t sit down to write my column until Thursday but most weeks I have a semblance of an idea by Wednesday, at the latest. That’s what I get for having my last two columns clearly thought out in advance. So, in honor of the dinner I am making my family tonight, I’m serving up my Friday potluck thoughts of the week.

• What a great discussion on Patch over the past week with Lisa Vasile’s article about . Weight hits home for everybody in one way or another. It’s a very personal and delicate subject, but it is a real problem that needs more real dialogue than it has been given. The comments on Patch were thoughtful and not too snippy. There was discourse and common ground. It's nice to know we can disagree and use manners. Obesity is a growing problem; open and hearty discussions can lead to better, more understanding solutions. Great job, Patchers!

• Thank goodness, Red Sox opening day is finally here. One more minute listening to “experts” rework lineups and pitching orders ad nauseum might have done me in. I swear, baseball talk starts earlier every year. Is it just me? People complain about the "pink hats" but from the moment pitchers and catchers report it’s like every guy in a Red Sox cap thinks he has the inside line on what moves Epstein should make and what lineups Tito should post. News flash, you don’t have an inside line. All that said, I can’t wait to watch Lester this season and I think watching Crawford will be a blast.  

• On a similar note, experts suggest you start clearing out your garden beds on Opening Day. (You’re also supposed to prepare them for the winter when the season ends.) I had plans to start today, but there’s supposed to be snow though, so...well...guess I’ll have to start getting those garden beds ready next week. Awesome. Nothing like an April Fool’s NorEaster to remind us all how much we love living in New England. And please stop complaining about the snow all over my Facebook page. You live in New England, it’s part of the deal.

• MCAS and report cards. I don’t have much to say here except, it’s OK to give the kids homework on MCAS week. I’m not sure where the idea of giving them the week off from homework to “prepare” for MCAS came from, but let’s get over that. MCAS is a long day of testing, for sure, but it’s OK to expect more from them. They’ll have to handle a lot more than that so, pile it on. 

• I went to Brookline last weekend to see the limited release of the 22nd remake of Jane Eyre. I was so moved, that I’m re-reading it now. It is my all-time favorite classic. It’s not quirky and joyful like Jane Austen’s Emma or Sense and Sensibility. It is dark and gothic and unbelievably well-written. I can’t imagine what it would be like to write something that could stand the test of 170 years. But what’s most amazing is that those first few pages, the ones every new book tries to pack with stuff to hold your attention, are subtle and wandering. The instant gratification is missing. The payoff is the entire book, not the first 10 pages. Sort of like life.

• I’m not sure what’s going to happen with the but I would seriously consider moving if they are allowed to have strippers there. The thought of men leering at women stripping bugs me, but more than that, it's having to tell people who aren’t sure where I live..."Milford, off 495, the place with the big stripper warehouse.” "Oh, right, the stripper warehouse. I heard about that place."

You know what would be great, “Doc?” Turn that beast into a nice big brewery, Blackstone Brewery. Exposed brick, comfy sofas, rafter ceilings. I’d be a regular customer.

In closing; gather the family at the table for dinner, Go Sox, the snow won’t last, consider the classics and brainstorm some ideas in the comments section for Doc’s.